


Speaking bullets without considering the exit wound

by TheCarelessVoice



Category: Daredevil (TV), The Punisher (TV 2017)
Genre: Arguments, Heavy Angst, Hurt No Comfort, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, M/M, Seriously why didn't I just write something happy and wholesome?, Some OCs but like for a second, and boy did it went downhill pretty quickly, no beta we die like men!, shouting
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-15
Updated: 2020-11-15
Packaged: 2021-03-09 21:48:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,346
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27573346
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheCarelessVoice/pseuds/TheCarelessVoice
Summary: “A soft word turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.” -- Proverbs 15:1
Relationships: Frank Castle/Matt Murdock
Comments: 1
Kudos: 37





	Speaking bullets without considering the exit wound

“I had it under control! I had a plan!”

Matt was pacing around the room trying not to lose his mind over all the voices and smells and Fuck!

_Don't they realize that he's breaking down?!_

He stopped suddenly, turning his head towards Frank, his glassy eyes now red with rage and anger, not meeting him but settling somewhere around his left shoulder.

“I can’t believe I was ever stupid enough to think I knew you.”

Matt whispered with a cracked voice, which was even worse than him shouting and yelling at Frank.

"Oh you know me well enough red, you just love to lie to yourself."

Frank smiled bitterly, knowing that it was true and it seemed to piss Matt off even more.

_Good_

Now Matt was trembling with anger, the devil inside him begging to be let out. His breathing was becoming quicker by seconds.

"Do you even feel anything when you pull your goddamn trigger?!

Matt kept his focus on Frank. His inside was on fire but for some reason, he felt numb. Frank's heart was beating so loud that it felt deafening. Matt couldn't break down now. He took a deep breath to control the fire.

"Do you have any idea how a person's heartbeat sounds like when it suddenly stops?"

Frank rubbed his tired eyes and sighed. Matt should've been used to it by now. The earth had one less scumbag in it. So what if he was begging for his mercy at the last minute like he was apologizing for some mundane shit. There was no way that Frank was gonna let him live. No amount of Sorrys and Pleases was gonna change that fact and Matt was too busy calming the terrified girl who had a bomb attached to her body that he couldn't do anything when the man's body hit the ground.

What they didn't expect was that the girl had already made up her mind. As soon as Frank heard the trembling little voice saying sorry he stopped thinking. He just grabbed Matt with every strength he had in his body and throw themselves behind the kitchen counter.

_Bang_

That excruciating sound lasted just a millisecond. But in that very moment, Frank suddenly tasted the hot sands beneath him and the copper and human flesh and goddammit why was he having a flashback?! Someone was trembling under him and for a second he could swear that he saw Lisa's face, meat pouring from it and the lips moving.

_What did you do Dad?_

_Dad_

_D..a...d_

_Frank_

_What did you do Frank?_

Now here they are, in the middle of Matt's apartment with nothing between them but tension and rage, so it was fair when things only got worse from there.

"If you could’ve given me a little bit of time I-.." Matt managed to say but Frank interrupted him, already feeling his own anger coming to the surface.

"You know I never have been someone to take the moral high ground." Frank scoffed.

"Blood and broken bones are much simpler, red. Don’t you think?” The words were out of his mouth before he could stop them. He almost laughed hysterically. If only Maria was here to see how much of a monster he had truly become.

Matt's eyes widened. He couldn't believe what he just heard, and everything around him froze for a second. The steady and strong sound of Frank's heart was the only thing he could hear clearly.

He shook his head and tilted it downward so Frank wouldn't see his face darkening. A huge wave of grief hit his body, letting a single tear escaping from his right eye and dropping on the ground.

Soon after that, his eyes just couldn't stop dripping.

Matt couldn't allow himself to sob and once he sensed that Frank was coming near him, he swallowed a rock hard lump on this throat

“I hate you." He chocked out the words

"I hate everything you stand for, every fiber of your being.”

Frank's breathing got cut off and his heartbeat faster. There it was, the ugly face of fury, finally showing itself on his face. He stumped down towards Matt and grabbed his collar, his breath hot on his skin.

And from then on it became a war.

“Oh, now you hate me?! Now you say you don't know me?!" He looked up and let out a dry laugh.

"So what huh?" Frank said, his voice getting louder with each word.

"What did you want in the beginning red? What did you think would happen?”

Then he yelled at Matt while shaking him.

"What, did you think you could _fix_ me or some bullshit?!"

Matt grabbed Frank's forearms, pushing them away from his body, then he stumbled back to put some distance between them.

Breathing seemed like such a challenge when all he could do was sobbing.

Frank was panting hard, trying so hard to force his legs to move so he could go to Matt, even if to just touch his arm. With each step he managed to take forward Matt's were taking him backward until he hit the brick wall and slide down onto the floor.

“I wish you’d just leave me alone; I wish I’d never met you.”

Matt murmured quietly, no longer having the power to stand.

Frank sat in front of him with his head down, wishing for it to be another nightmare he could wake up from.

“You know" Matt let out a sigh and continued

"You should’ve just killed me, I could’ve just been another body in an abandoned warehouse and all this-" He gestured between them "could've never happened. "

Matt sensed when the slap was coming, but like most of the things that happened tonight, he just couldn't believe it. The sound went through his head and It stung so bad that he thought he's gonna have a red mark on his left cheek for the rest of his life.

Frank didn't know what came over him, but something snapped when he heard what Matt said.

His mind was reeling. He found himself up on his feet, going farther and farther away looking at Matt whose hand was rubbing the angry mark on his cheek, and his eyebrows furrowing in confusion.

Now it was Frank's turn to drop on the floor sobbing and forcing words out.

"Don't you... ever... say those words to me... ever again.... you hear me?"

Then he shouted with his hoarse voice

"You. Hear. Me. Red?!"

He looked up and Matt nodded at him, still too shocked to react.

He should yell at Frank, go to him and slap him back or snarl at his face. Why wouldn't his body move?

He sensed when Frank got up, went to the sofa, and grabbed his jacket. His heartbeat was already going back to its steady rhythm. He then turned to matt and looked at what he just shattered between them.

"You always know when I'm lying," he smiled sadly "So you’ll know this one is true, I wish I could turn back time to a few minutes ago so I could stop myself, but" He paused to take a deep breath.

"If we could go back to a few hours ago, I would still kill that man and still choose you over that girl, and there was nothing you could do to change that."

Frank walked down the hallway to the door and turned the knob to open it.

"I would always choose you, red."

He stepped out of the door and disappeared into the night, the heavy sound of his steps getting quieter and quieter.

As always, his heartbeat never wavered.

_I'm singing 'la la la' in empty rooms that carry sounds like hollow caves_  
_'La la la' just to prove you're not the only one that can occupy a borrowed space_  
_'La la la' for every ship that was set to sail but got washed away_  
_I'm singing 'la la la' in desperate hopes that when it bounces back I hear the octave change._

**Author's Note:**

> Wow! This is literally my first time posting anything on Ao3/writing a fic for this fandom!! I always wanted to write something with anger as a theme, and who better to test it on than my favorite vigilante husbands?!  
> I haven't beta'd this and by the time I finished writing it I was too sleep-deprived to check for errors, plus English is not my first language so bear with me. :)  
> comments and kudos are much appreciated!!
> 
> Come find me on tumblr>> thecarelessvoice  
> Also, the title and the last part are taken from the song "You Said Okay" By Flatsound.
> 
> Enjoy reading.


End file.
